Pianism and music has been put on hold for my other responsibilities. There isn’t a lot of time in day, sadly… or, I’m just terrible at time management. Here’s what I’ve been working on, in-between marking students’ work for my sessional job as a drawing instructor:
The cover for my PhD comic. Admittedly, it’s been a while since I’ve digitally painted anything therefore, with this drawing I’ve been doing studies here and there.
I’ll allow this post to be a reflection of sorts. That is, acting as a reference for my own development and growth as a person.
This year, I will be solely focusing on these things… above all else:
Music. Learning More Of It.
Finishing My PhD.
Building More Of My Finances.
Looking After My Sons:
I adopted some rats, at the end of last year. Three brothers. Fancy rats, with beautiful unique patterns to their coats. Each different, in their personalities and temperament… and so, they were named.
Chopin, for his being sensitive and sooky. Chopin likes to bite my Nephew. Chopin is the most obese, out of the lot.
Ratmaninoff (Rachmaninoff) for his being the most intelligent. He’s often the first one to break out. He is also the alpha male with the largest testicles. I found it fitting, since Rachmaninoff has large hands. Heuheuheuhe.
And Liszt, for being the friendliest fella. He’s the runt, and the most playful.
It’s kind of funny naming my rats after pianists. I enjoy conversing with them, as owners tend to do with their beloved pets. Often, I’ll find that I do a double-take and chuckle at what I’ve said: “Liszt, stop urinating all over Chopin!” or “Ratmaninoff, why did you take a crap on Chopin?” And! “Ratmaninoff, stop biting Chopin and Liszt!” Also, I had to go to the vet, recently. Ratmaninoff has been ill as of late. Anyway, they were puzzled to hear his name, and so, they bluntly asked me for a nickname. To-which, I gave them “Sergei”. I remember stuttering on the phone like an idiot beforehand, with my stating his name: “R…r…atmaninoff…” Therein followed, an awkward pause from the woman, on the other end… which led her to request a nickname. My nephew calls him ‘Rach’, but I see‘Sergei’as being respectful to the original sexy Rachmaninoff.
Yes, I has me a crush on the Russian composer, and pianist Rachmaninoff. He was damned hot in his youth. Bet he was good at chess too, mhmm~ Him and Frederic Chopin. Franz Liszt, not so much. Sorry Franz, you’re too pretty.
Note: Disregard that.
Since then, I have went out and adopted three more rats: Mozart, Papa Haydn, and Beethoven. They are delicious specimens. PHOTOGRAPHS COMING SOON!
Yes… come sweet death.
With the first chapter of my PhD comic out of the way (I must complete the 2nd, before the end of this year) I’ve been pouring my ‘free’ days into pianism… whilst the circumstances allow it. Then it’s back to drawing, and Academia yet again.
Some progress shots of Chapter I complete:
Romantic is a period of music, and art… isn’t it?
The concept of harmony is only found in the conventions of music. What is this human contact, you speak of? Living in harmony… people are capable of harmonizing?
When people kiss, I do believe they’re transferring disease to one another.
When someone gives me the eye in public, I threaten them. Telling them, that they should keep that eye to themselves–then they’re quick to correct me, in that they are using TWO of their eyes, and not ONE of them.
I don’t care too much about your face. I believe you should notice, that I barely look you in the eye. I am more interested in your hands. More than likely, on a date, I will ask to see your hands. You have been warned.
Anyone who knows their way around seven octaves, has always got my interest. I will therein, proceed to ask you questions about how you do that–and then you will get slightly uncomfortable, due to the unsolicited attention I am paying to you. Relax, I just want your secret formula.
I like men and women, just fine. No bias, my dudes.
In attempting to be ‘special’ and ‘unique’, we unknowingly move toward a totalitarian society. Yes, if everyone is aiming for that objective, don’t you think it’s counter-intuitive? The only true way to become one’s self, is to do so… in complete solitude. I am a fucking weirdo, and I quite like that about myself.
If there was a clone of myself, I’d marry them. Hell, male or female. I’d like to see how long it would take for me to drive myself nuts–then again, I do a good job of that on my own… and there’s only ONE of me. I think we’d get on well. I’d get the other me to be a pianist, and I’d have this ‘me’ (the one typing) continue their Academic career.
It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything on drawing. Not to worry, however… I’ve been working on that amidst my musical journey:
Those of us with Asperger’s (High-functioning ASD) find it difficult to initiate eye contact with others. Personally speaking, as an autistic person myself… eye contact is very difficult.
I have to push myself to maintain eye contact, and I often do so, with strangers in public so as to disguise myself. However, in doing so… I tend to overload my ability to process what I am experiencing.
The struggle with eye-contact has to do with that extra layer of processing. The micro nuances of socialization. The eyes can convey very much, and at times… staring into people’s eyes is extremely intense. I don’t remember the way people’s faces look, to be honest. It takes me a long time to remember what someone looks like, facially speaking. Since, many people exhibit a single emotion in different ways. There aren’t people who smile the same way, for instance.
The world presents itself intensely to me, as an Autistic person. This is attributed to what many would call “Intense World Theory”, a new concept which requires a lot more research… that may act as an integral puzzle piece to how the ASD individual consciousness processes their reality.
In sharing a little of my experience… the world is strange, and people are strange to me. I often feel misunderstood, and I feel that I can come on a little bit too intense for people’s tastes. I can, at times be blunt… and I tend to deviate away from being stereotypically feminine–or passive. It can be off-putting to many. Trivial matters, such as popular mainstream media do not appeal to me, and I’d rather exchange philosophical constructive concepts over chatter which is–say like… anything ‘trivial’. For example, pointless gossip or celebrity bullshit.
It is for that reason, I tend to relate very well… to high-functioning autists like myself.
I wasn’t satisfied with the above, so I’ve re-drawn him to be more ‘warm’.
He’s a treble, and bass man. One for each hand. And he isn’t all that nice, per se. He is an imago to the darker side–the shadow, of one’s psyche. In this case, my character Stuart’s psyche. The darker aspects of one’s psyche, if integrated successfully holds great potential for creativity. The best of creatives, have danced with the darker aspects of themselves at one point or another. Those who deny that darkness within themselves, are doomed to be forever controlled by it… that is, unconsciously.
Mmmmm… next time, I will draw his hands in shot. Them ivory ticklers like to display their hands~ those with large hands, and long fingers which taper to a point are my favorite to draw… that as well as, wispy gamine pianists.